Seventeen year old wishful me had thought a few things would happen by the time I turned twenty one. Now that I’m a few months away from 22, I thought, Hey! Let’s take a trip down memory lane, shall we!
Le conversation between my past and present. You can guess which is which.
“These zits are going to be history”
Sorry soul sister, but these zits still manage to magnificently materialize out of your forehead or your cheeks or nose, you name it, right before a big party or that occasional get-together you have with your high school mates where, everyone a. looks fabulous b. looks fabulous c. looks fabulous. And just for the record, you still look like you could do with a few extra pounds and ahem, up there too. And no, you still don’t go to the gym. Or do power yoga. But if it’s any consolation, you wish you did – every single morning.
“I’ll be in the perfect job”
Far from it. Turns out, you actually have a lot of hard work to do before that happens.
“I’mma be rolling in them dollars”
Stop talking like you’re gangster. And no! You’re not ‘rolling in them dollars’. Who do you think you are?! Your bank account figures are disgraceful.
“I will love Linkin Park forever”
You still love them but you just don’t listen to their music anymore. You’re just 21 and loud music hurts your ears already.
“My skin & hair care routine is going to be impeccable. Healthy choices will be second nature”
See answer to ‘rolling in them dollars’. Impeccable skin care routine come at a cost apparently. And as far as healthy choices are concerned,
“My rotis will be so round”
Sorry, they still look like somebody with a rolling pin went crazy on a pile of dough. Making mom think you’ll make a good daughter-in-law for someone someday?
Forget about it.
“I will have taken things to the next level with the love of my life”
So yeah! Let me know what other bubbles of your delusional younger self you have had to, unfortunately, burst!